Mask

For the most part, I am very good at hiding when I'm in emotional turmoil. I like it this way. I don't like bother my friends with my problems. In my whole life, there have been maybe five people who could see right through the act. Once I become aware of the fact that a person can tell if I'm in a bad place or not, I find that it's even harder to keep my mask in place. Without meaning to, I start shaking or becoming more withdrawn. A part of me goes "Why bother trying? They're going to know anyway." So I try to avoid eye contact with these people. Or I try and avoid speaking with them at all. They can't tell if I don't interact with them, right?